


Can we be happy now?

by Yawa_Rafhael



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Bellarke, F/M, The 100 - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-14
Updated: 2019-08-21
Packaged: 2020-09-01 01:09:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20249659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yawa_Rafhael/pseuds/Yawa_Rafhael
Summary: Hey everyone,this is my first fan-fic. I'm not a native English speaker - so I apologize in advance for the many mistakes I will make - sorry.My story starts with some scenes of Bellamy /Clarke from seasons 5 and 6. It doesn't change the story. It's just what I think/hoped what's going on in their heads in these moments. After that it begins after season 6.Hope you enjoy reading.





	1. Chapter 1

What I interpreted happening in the scenes:

Scene when Bellamy arrives back on earth and meets Madi for the first time:  
"Bellamy? Clark new you would come!"  
His heart stopped. At least that's what it felt like, after the second it started pumping again. Pumping so hard, that he felt a pain in his chest. She's alive. She survived. She's not dead. Which was followed by: We left her. I left her. I let her go. Madis words. The words he never let himself imagine to hear. The words that made him feel relieved and hurt with the same intensity. And like always - she was in danger. No time for any more feelings, before he knew he would really see her again.

Scene when Bellamy comes for the negotiations and Clarke sees him for the first time after the six years:  
It's him. He recognized his voice before she saw him. He was standing in front of the headlights. She barely listened to what they were saying. She felt so much joy despite the fear she already felt that she burst into tears. Her heart jumped when she saw him. He came back to her. She looked in his face, and he was the same Bellamy she lost 6 years ago. He seemed older, but it felt the same. His appearance made her feel save already . She knew, he would get her out of there. They were making a deal. 283 people for her live.  
"283 people for one. She must be pretty important to you!", Diyoza said.  
"She is". His eyes fixed on Clarke.  
He came back to her. She wouldn't be alone anymore. She and Madi wouldn't be alone.

Scene when Clark/Madi and Bellamy/Echo are reunited  
She got her daughter back. She was save with her. Now they could save the others, win this stupid war and live happily together in the valley. Behind Madi came Echo storming out of the car. She was running to. She was running towards Bellamy and he was running towards her. The fell in each others arms. Clarke watched in shock, trying to understand what's happening, when they started to kiss. For a second her heart dropped. She stared at them for a moment, but she couldn't handle that now. There are more important things. Her daughter is here. She looked down to her. Madi needs her. More than she needs Bellamy. She was waiting for him for so long. There will be time to feel heartbroken about it once they are all save. Now all that is important is her daughter. No one else matters. She wouldn't survive losing Madi. She would do everything for Madi to survive. Although it hurt already, she knew she won't get a happy ending with Bellamy. It was probably too much to hope for. She got Madi. Her mother is still alive. She will survive not having him.

Scene when they are waiting on Murphy and Monty; Madi comes talking to Bellamy:  
They have to wait. They can' t leave them behind. Not again. Not, when there's zero chance that they survive it.  
He left Clarke and he will regret it for the rest of his life. Even now that he's so angry at her. She left him to die. She doesn't care about him anymore. She doesn't care about him how he hoped she would care. But how could she. He left her behind. Alone. He couldn't to this to Murphy and Monty too. They need to wait.  
Madi joins him: "You have to forgive her". Clarke. "Now is not he time, Madi"  
"Do you have any idea how much she cares about you".  
"So much she left me to die in the fighting pit!"  
He couldn't deal with this now. He understood why she would let him die. He had left her. He had given up on her. She did the same. But that didn't mean, that he didn't care. That he didn't feel betrayed.  
"That was a mistake. How many mistakes did you make to protect the child you love?"  
"That was different"  
"Was it?"  
Bellamy looked at Madi and she continued: "I shouldn't tell you this, but when you were on the ring she called you on the radio every day. For six years." His heart started to race. She didn't let go of him. All this time. She was always thinking of him. Talking to him.  
"You didn't know, did you" Madi wasn't expecting an answer, because she already knew. He looked back at Clarke. There was so much he felt inside. Hope. Love. Clarke was looking back at him, but she gazed away. Shame for what she had done?  
They were interrupted when they thought Murphy and Monty were cumming. But it must have been the wind. Raven told them again, that they had to leave. But he couldn't stand the thought of leaving them behind. He had left Clarke. And he had loved her. "Bellamy, we have to go", Clarke begged.  
"Clarke, you can do what you have to, but I am not leaving my friends." He'd rather die. He couldn't leave on with not being able to have saved them. He turned around and looked at her. "I can't do that again."  
"Raven, we need a little more time." Clarke couldn't close the door. She couldn't leave Bellamy behind. They had to wait. That's when they saw them.  
************************************************************************************************************************************************************  
Bellamy was looking for Clarke. She was sitting in front of the She looked tired. When she noticed him, she looked up. She didn't think he would ever speak to hear again. But there he was, sitting down next to her. "How's Murphy?", he asked.  
"Jackson got both bullets, he'll be okay." Of course, he just wanted to ask about his friends. "Cockroaches are hard to kill. - And Gaia's going to keep her leg!", she added.  
"Kane?", Bellamy asked.  
"They put him in a drug induced coma. I'm not sure why, but Jackson says there's not enough of the drug to keep him that way for long. It doesn't look good."  
"What if he didn't need the drug? I don't know much about cryo-sleep, but at least it will keep him alive.  
"That's brilliant!", why hasn't she thought of it herself. "I tell my mum." She stood up, but he interrupted her:"Hey, when you finished come to the bridge - we decide about the fate of the human race. Again. You should be there"  
"You're not mad at me for leaving you at polis?"  
"The commander ordered me not to be." he smiled lightly. She was so thankful for Madi. She made everything better.  
"I'll meet you on the bridge!" Clarke reassured him.  
There was so much to talk about. He wanted to say something. But he didn't know what. Okay, he knew what. She was talking to him for six years on the radio. But he didn't know why. But she needed to tell her Mother about his idea. It had to wait. They will have time for that later.  
************************************************************************************************************************************************************  
Later they decided to all go into Cryo-sleep. They watched everyone go to sleep and Bellamy and Clarke where the two last, except for Monty and Harper on the bridge. They looked at each other for a moment. She wanted to say something, so did he. But they were both to scared to say something.

scene: Walking up 125 years later  
Clarke woke up. She got out of the sleeping coffin. She was alone. She looked at Madi. And she was still there - sleeping peacefully. On the other side someone else got woken up. Bellamy. When he woke up he looked at her. A smile on his face appeared. "Hey", he looked around and noticed, that the others were still asleep. "why is it just us?" did something go wrong?

Echo:  
They woke her up. Bellamy was there.  
"Hey, it's good to see you again", he said. Smiling down at her and helping her up. She leaned it for a kiss, but he was already pulling her into a tight hug. It's not what she expected, but considering everyone else was getting up around them, it could wait.  
When everyone was awake Bellamy told them to come to the bridge. She saw the video Monty and Harper had left behind. She was so sad they are gone, but what bothered her was, that they had ordered Jordan to wake up Clarke and Bellamy first. - Always the two of them. Everyone saw them as a package deal. And they were. Worst thing is that everyone knew and saw, except for them.  
She knows he might leave her for Clarke, but what she always knew and learned was, nothings certain. Everything can change.  
She thinks back to the time, when they were back in space. Just the six of them: Monty, Harper, Murphy, Emori, Raven, Bellamy and she. Clarke had died to save them. That's at least everyone thought. Bellamy was devastated and it was not just, because they have left her to die. He had noticed, that he has been in love with her. And now she was dead and gone, and he couldn't do anything about it. He got really frustrated and mad at everyone for years. But he finally came around and let go of his anger. He even let his anger at her go. After all, she laid the trap that got his girlfriend Gina killed. Sometimes you think people will never forgive and forget anything. But time and loneliness can cure a lot.  
So after a while he let her in. And she gave in as well. Letting herself have feelings. Crushing on him.  
First she feared everything would change when they got back to earth, but then Clarke betrayed them all and left Bellamy to die. So she thought they might actually have a shot. But she knows Bellamy already forgave Clarke for that. But what can she do. She's a fighter. She's not giving up as long as he stays loyal to her. She has to give it a try. She has to hope, that he loves her too. And not everyone forgave Clarke for what she did. Echo knew why Clarke did it. She accepted her decision. It was not good for everyone else involved, but she knew Clarke thought it was the right thing to do to keep Madi save. She wasn't happy about it, but she could accept it. Kill or get killed. She learned that, when she was very young.

Scene when they arrived at the sanctum, Echo and Bellamy on the swings, Clarke a bit behind watching them:  
Besides Bellamy Echo was probably the only one in this group down here that didn't want her dead. Echo had changed a lot - for the better, she knew that. And right now, Clarke knew, Echo was way better for Bellamy, then she could ever be. He seems happy with her. He might have had feelings for her once too, but he's with Echo now. She can never tell him how she feels. He probably would just feel bad for rejecting her and it would ruin their friendship. But she couldn't just stand there, watching them being together. She went inside one of the houses and looked around. A family lives there.  
Bellamy has followed her inside:  
"I wish Madi could have gone to school."  
"I wish Octavia could have."  
"Instead, they just has us to screw them up - Still no luck on the radio?"  
"No."  
"Trust me, I know the feeling."  
"I'm sorry I couldn't respond all those years." , he blurted out. Clarke looked at him. How did he know that. She blushed and her face heated up.  
"Madi told me"  
"Of course she did", she felt exposed.  
"I know it sounds crazy, Madi certainly thought it was, but talking to you every day, even though you didn't answer, i kept me sane." She tried to explain without giving any more feelings.  
"It's not crazy. Little pathetic, maybe, but it's not crazy." They both laughed it off the awkwardness.  
"Yeah", she looked at him, trying to find out what he was thinking. Hoping for him to say: He talked to her too. Every day. That he had thought of her everyday. But she recalled the fact, that he was with Echo. That he has moved on. That he wasn't pathetic. That he wasn't holding on.  
"I'm gonna go and watch "The Murphy Show"", she excused herself. She couldn't stand there next to him, when all she wanted to do is cry and scream how unfair it was, that he got the be happy. And she got to be alone. She needed to get out, before she'd something say, she would regret.


	2. Chapter 2

After dinner with the lightbourn-Family:  
She knew Monty and Harper gave her a second a chance. A chance to do better at this new world. But sitting here. This familiy knowing all she had done. It didn't feel right. Who are they to judge her. They don't know her. She wish she could forget all these horrible things she's done, but her friends won't let her. The way Jordan has talked to them about her, she looks like this disgusting monster. Like she deserved everything bad happening to her. But all she want to be is forget. Heal. Move on. And do better. Doesn't that count for anything?

Naming Day, dancing:  
Just for once Carke wanted to feel like a normal young woman. They were at the party, and everything seemed so "not real". This is what life should be. Easy. And fun. The sanctums doctor, Cillian, has asked to dance with her, so she did. He swung her around in her beautiful dress. She couldn't help but feel desirable for the first time in a while. It's like in this moment she could let go of her past. All the horrible memories are banished to a place in the back. And let go of Bellamy too. She has to hope, that she could move on and find someone new. She deserved a fresh start.

Bellamy was watching Clarke from afar. She seemed happy. And he hasn't seen her like that for too long. She deserved to be happy. After all what she did for him, for everyone. She was dancing with Cillian. He was admiring her and touching Clarke, and a spark of jealousy rushed through him. But he shouldn't be jealous. He's with Echo. His mind drifted back to Octavia. He just told her, that she's on her own now. He still wanted to see her as his little sister, but he had meant it, when he said, that his sister died a long time ago. All he saw, when he looked at her, was Blodreina. Evil and ruthless. And he felt hopeless, because he just didn't know how to bring her back.

After her night at the bar Echo joined everyone else in the dancing hall. She saw Bellamy. He watched Clarke dance with that doctor guy. And she felt the needles in her heart. How could he so evidently stare at Clarke. He looked surrowful.   
"Hey", his gaze didn't change when he looked at her, "What's wrong?", she asked.  
"The last time I was at a party, my sister was arrested."  
"Bellamy, if you're gonna tear yourself apart over leaving her, let's go get her." A spark of hope grew inside her. That means his look wasn't the jealousy of Clarke dancing with another guy. It was because of his sister.  
"This isn't me tearing myself apart, this is me being human. Feeling things when people I love are in trouble or die". He was mad at her. How could he be mad at her now. She didn't do anything wrong.  
"The Echo I knew on the ring did that. Why don't you?" Yeah, maybe because we didn't have to do anything else. And she didn't feel unwanted, she thought to herself.  
"This isn't about me." How could he not see what's bothering her?  
"No? We lost Monty and Harper three days ago. How do you feel about that, cause I have no idea." He looked disappointed, but she couldn't help feeling the same towards him.  
"I lost my sister yesterday. It's gonna take me a little while to feel nothing, like a good Azgeda spy. But I'll keep trying."  
She didn't know what to say. Does he really think that little of her. That she didn't care about that they had lost Monty and Harper. What would it change, if they talked about it. That wouldn't change the fact that they are not here anymore. She never had many friends. Hell, before the ring she didn't have any friends. She wanted to scream. Because what bothered her most was Clarke, and she was mad at herself, that it bothered her so much, that she couldn't let herself grief for Monty and Harper. She felt bad about it, because that made her a bad friend. And Bellamy doesn't even realize how this thing between Clarke and him hurts her. How scared she is of losing him too. It's like he doesn't know her at all. Even at the ring, they never had these deep conversations. It was more like they didn't need to talk, because they already knew, what the other meant without saying a word. An understanding that they would be there for each other and take each other for who they are.   
All she could do is walk away. Hoping he would follow her and apologize.   
Bellamy watched her go. Echo was not the only one leaving. Clarke and Cillian had left too. He felt stupid and alone. He didn't want to hurt Echo. Back at the ring, she fixed him. She made him move on. She brought him back to life and showed him new happiness. And now he acted like a jerk.

Echo went back to the bar. Not long after, Bellamy had followed her.  
"Hey"  
She didn't look at him, and poured in her next shot.  
"Look, I'm a jerk." Yes, you are!  
"I was taking my feelings about Octavia out on you. And I'm sorry." He meant it, she knew.   
"I do miss them. Monty and Harper. I may not show it, but I do.", Echo started.  
"I know - I know", he reassured her.  
"You were right. I feel myself closing down again." She needed to open up. That's what he wants, isn't it.  
"Of course you are, we've been fighting to survive since the moment we left the ring."  
"I've been fighting to survive all my life." The ring was the home she felt save. And loved. And that was gone now. She thought back to the moment The only other home she knew was with her parents.  
"I was eight, when Queen Nia's Army took our land. My father resisted. They killed him. While my mother hid with me in the cellar. "If you cry, They'll hear you, she said. So I didn't"  
"You told me you didn't remember your parents.", interrupted her.  
"Best way to get rats out of their hole - start a fire. I remember the way it smelled. But the smoke... her hair....", she could barely speak: "when Nia heard what happened, she executed the men that did it, had me brought to troy and started my training." She was so lost in her memory.  
"Come here", Bellamy sat down next to her. And waited for her to look at him: "I hate that that happened to you. But everything we've been through has brought us here. From now on, we look forward. Not back.". And finally he kissed her again. She felt a flush of happiness rushing through her body.

Scene Bellamy sitting on the bench, after everyone heard about Clarke being dead:  
He needed to be alone. They shouldn't see, how he is falling apart. He lost her again. How could that happen. How could she be gone just like that. And every time he sees her now, he get's his hopes up, but when she starts talking, all there is, is Josephine. And Clarke's dead. His heart shattered and ached. He made that deal with Russel for everyone to survive. They show them how to make nightbloods, and every remaining Woncru gets to live. Here. In peace. But is that really what Clarke would have wanted. To accept it. It felt so wrong, but he just couldn't see how else they get a chance to live. And he wished nothing more than for her to be here. In his arms.   
He wanted to give up too, but the one thing he was sure of what Clarke would have wanted was, to take care of Madi.


	3. Chapter 3

Scene Bellamy / Clarke (Josephine) are prisoners of the Children of Gabriel, in the cave:  
"She can hear us?", Bellamy asked.  
"It would seem so. Which means the wall separating our minds is almost gone. When that happens, she'll stroke out, I'll download, and you can say goodbye to your genocidal friend."  
"Let me talk to her!"  
"I'd have to give over control for that, so no."  
"But she can hear me?"  
"Yes, she can hear you." Josephine was watching him. He was clearly thinking about what to say. He stared at her.  
"For God's sake, just say what you want to say!".   
"I won't let you die". That's all he said. That's all that was important. Everything else would distract them from the plan.

Scene after Clarke got Josephine out of her body  
She looked at him.   
Bellamy. He saved her - again. He helped her fighting back Josephine. She couldn't have done it without him. She didn't feel strong enough to do it, to fight for her life. It seemed so much easier to just let go. But when she heard him screaming for hear that she shouldn't let go, that she had to keep on fighting. Se did it. For him. And when she had opened her eyes, she saw how happy he was when he realized she was still alive. And she felt happy too. She felt so special, so loved. Even when it was just for a moment. And when she looked into his eyes all she could think of was how badly she wanted to kiss him. She knew it for a while now. She loved him. She did for a long time now. But now it hurt, because she knew she had to fight the urge to kiss him. So instead she hugged him tight. She felt so save in his arms. She closed her eyes again and tried to hold on to this for a little moment longer, but like always there was no time.

**********************************************************************************************************************  
Next chapter will start the actual story :) This was just for you to know where I'm standing and going with the story.  
**********************************************************************************************************************


	4. Chapter 4

"Octavia! Octavia!"  
Bellamy screamed, but he already knew, he wouldn't get an answer. His sister was gone. And he had no clue what to do. He didn't even know, if she was still alive.   
To be honest, he didn't know anything and he felt helpless. Echo followed him out of the tent. The green lightning has already vanished and everything felt normal. Even the weird static noise came back. Everything was normal except that Octavia was gone - or dead. Probably both, but Bellamy wouldn't allow himself to think that.  
"We need to find her", he murmurs to Echo.   
"And we will!" She agreed.  
Shortly after Gabriel joined them.  
"What did just happen?" Bellamy asked Gabriel, his voice reproachful. "I had this feeling, this would be a bad idea. We should have destroyed that thing!"   
"Bellamy. I didn't know this would happen. She will come back. Octavia already got out of the anomaly once. She will do it again."  
"She will do it again? Hope stabbed her. She's probably dead by now!" Bellamy was breathing heavy, fighting off the tears.  
"We need to open that thing again. We need to find her! I need to go after her."  
"We need a plan first!", Echo tried to calm him a bit.  
"Where is she?"  
"Locked up down there." Hope Diyoza. She has passed out after she had stabbed Octavia.  
"You said that when Octavia came back from the anomaly, it was like she had spent some time there. Maybe this thing get's you to another time? Or to another place?"  
Octavia has said, the anomaly send her back. To do something. I bet it was to open that thing. That's why she had the tattoo." He didn't really ask Gabriel, it was more like he tried to explain to himself, what had happened.   
"Maybe she knew to much. Hope might have stabbed her because of it, Echo added.  
"We need to get her to talk. She's been there. She grew up there. I mean - here she wouldn't have been even born yet. And she's already grown up. It doesn't make any s..."

"Bellamy?", they where interrupted by Clarke´s screams. She sounded scared. "Bellamy!?"  
She appeared between the woods, running towards them. She didn't stop until she fell into Bellamy's arms.  
"What happened? We saw that huge green burst. I thought you're dead!", she cried out.  
Bellamy wanted to say it's okay, but everything was far from okay.  
"Octavia. My sister. She's gone."  
"What?", she looked at him baffled. "How? Can anyone tell me what's going on?!"

They went back to the cave beneath the tent. Clarke was eyeing the anomaly stone.  
"What is this?"  
"It's an anomaly stone - at least that's what we call it!" Gabriel started to explain. "This stone is responsible for so much around us. We must understand it, if we want to live here. When Octavia was in the anomaly she got a tattoo of this stone. Of what it should look like. So we fixed it. We arranged those symbols accordingly. That's when the anomaly spread out. That's what you saw. The green light. It opened up the anomaly."  
"And then she came out of it." Bellamy pointed at Hope. "This is Hope Diyoza. And she tried to kill my sister."  
"No.", he got interrupted: "I didn't try. I killed her! That's why she disappeared. And that's why the door to the other side closed," Hope explained. She sounded sad.  
Bellamy sobbed in shock. Clarke rushed to his side. "She's dead?", she asked.  
"Well, yes and no. She's on the other side now. Which is like: she's probably going to die soon. Let's go somewhere we can talk - we don't have much time!"  
"Let's go back to Sanctum then", Clarke suggested.  
She turned back to Bellamy. He still looked pale. She took his hand: "We will find her. You will get her back", she said reassuring.   
"Ans she seems to care for your sister", she nodded in Hope's way. "At least for once we don't need to torture someone to get the answers we need." She made a grimace to release some of his tension.


End file.
